Chris Pratt Issues Preemptive Apology For "That Thing He (Will Have) Said"

Chris Pratt is really working his perfect gentleman image. He also somehow manages to come off as an adorable goof at the same time. Case in point: his apology, in advance, for any remarks made during the Jurassic World press tour.

Chris Pratt: national treasure.

He doesn’t yet know what he might say in the head of the moment, but Pratt just wanted to cover his back. The actor penned a hilarious sorry letter as he embarks on a worldwide tour to promote the upcoming film.

In a lengthy note posted to his Facebook page, Chris said he wanted to make a "heartfelt apology" for anything he might say, insisting: "I'm just dumb!"

The post was essentially the perfect apology, the Holy Grail for disgraced celebrities, referring to what Pratt dubbed “Jurassic Park-gate.” Note: Jurassic Park-gate has not yet happened. But Pratt just wanted to be on the safe side.

He wrote: "I want to make a heartfelt apology for whatever it is I end up accidentally saying during the forthcoming #JurassicWorld press tour.

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"I hope you understand it was never my intention to offend anyone and I am truly sorry. I swear.

"I'm the nicest guy in the world. And I fully regret what I (accidentally will have) said in (the upcoming foreign and domestic) interview(s)."

He continued: "I am not in the business of making excuses. I am just dumb. Plain and simple. I try. I REALLY try! When I do (potentially) commit the offensive act for which I am now (pre) apologizing you must understand I (will likely have been) tired and exhausted when I (potentially) said that thing I (will have had) said that (will have had) crossed the line."

Slow clap it out, people.