Noel Gallagher Goes On The Rampage. Arcade Fire, Look Away Now
Nobody escaped unscathed from Noel Gallagher's summary of music in 2013, apart from maybe Kanye West and David Bowie. The former Oasis man agreed to phone interview with Rolling Stone magazine to chat about his "f*cking shit year" hanging around the house and waiting for the year end.
Things started off on a positive note, with Gallagher hailing David Bowie's surprise comeback record The Next Day as a "f*cking masterpiece, saying, "I love it. Nobody has the right to be that f*cking good at this point in their career. Apart from Neil Young, all of the people that are in his league are basically f*cking shit. Do you know what I mean?"
He went on to call 'half' of the Arctic Monkeys album "really f*cking good" and claimed he'd listened to a Kanye West album for the first time.
"I'm not really a fan of his or anything like that," he said, "I don't really like that kind of modern hip-hop, whatever you call it. But somebody told me to watch this interview he did in England [with BBC DJ Zane Lowe], so I watched it, and I thought it was one of the best interviews I've ever seen. I f*ckin' loved it! Especially the bit about the leather jogging pants or whatever he's going on about, f*cking claiming he invented them."
2013 was the year that brought us Get Lucky, Wrecking Ball and Blurred Lines, but Noel only had something positive to say about one of those tracks. First up for a dressing down was Robin Thicke.
"I don't mind it. It sounded good on the radio. Got a bit annoying after the five millionth time you've heard it. I think he's going to be a one-hit wonder, surely. It'll be like that guy who's done "Gangnam Style" - we'll never hear from him again," he said of the American star.
"She was on TV recently, Miley Ray Cyrus, and it was just like, "What the f*ck is all this about?" he said of the controversial Bangerz singer, "I don't know. It's a shame, because it puts all the other female artists back about f*cking five years. Now, Adele and Emili Sande - that music, to me, is like music for f*cking grannies, but at least it's got some kind of credibility."
Watch the video for Noel Gallagher's 'Everbody's On The Run':
Daft Punk's summer anthem ticked all the boxes for Gallagher. "I'm not interested in the album," he said, "It's all about that song, isn't it? It's so effortless and brilliant and now. It's got everything. You just think, "Has this song always been around, or am I just hearing it for the first time?" It's f*cking amazing.
"My favorite act at this year's Glastonbury, when I went, was not the Rolling Stones, as great as they were; was not the Arctic Monkeys, as good as they were; was not Disclosure, as good as they were; but it was Chic. They were f*cking mega. Absolutely out of this world. Unfortunately [Nile Rodgers] didn't play "Get Lucky," but what an amazing, amazing track."
Next page: what Noel Gallagher thinks of Arcade Fire
Most critics had Arcade Fire's comeback record Reflektor in their Top 10 list, but the group's reputation suffered a little when they issued fans with a dress code for their upcoming shows before back tracking.
"I haven't heard it," Gallagher said of the album, "Anybody that comes back with a double album, to me, needs to pry themselves out of their own asshole. This is not the Seventies, okay? Go and ask Billy Corgan about a double album. Who has the f*cking time, in 2013, to sit through 45 minutes of a single album? How arrogant are these people to think that you've got an hour and a half to listen to a f*cking record?"
When gently nudged by the interviewer to discuss the whole dress code thing, Noel said, "Well, what's the point of that? Do you know what the point of that is? That is to take away from the sh*t disco that's coming out of the speakers. Because everybody's dressed as one of the Three Musketeers on acid. "What was the gig like?" "I don't know, everyone was dressed as a teddy bear in the Seventies." "Yeah, but what was the gig like?" "Ah, f*ck knows, man, I have no idea. I was dressed as a flying saucer." "Yeah, but what was the gig like?" "F*ck knows. I don't know."
Watch the video for Noel Gallagher's 'Dream On':
Elsewhere in the interview, Gallagher confirmed he wouldn't be releasing a new album in 2014 because he hadn't even started recording it yet. "I hope to do some recording in New York, because I've never done it before, and maybe on the off chance I might bump into David Bowie somewhere on the street, and get him to come down to the studio, dressed as an elf, and do a little mime while I'm putting an acoustic guitar track," he said.